I swear it was just yesterday that my daughter was born. But in fact it was actually 5 years ago. Well in a few weeks it will be five years exactly. And now this week I registered her for kindergarten. KIN-DER-GARTEN.
How did this happen?
Not that I’m not happy and excited to be moving into this new phase of motherhood. The phase where both kids are in school. I’m happy and excited to see my children growing into such wonderful people and I’m happy and excited to be regaining a little of my own freedom back that I traded in when I brought my firstborn home from the hospital.
But another part of me feels a little sad. I’m not sure that we’ll have a third child. And if we do, it won’t be soon. So sending my youngest off to Kindergarten is a milestone that leaves me a little empty on the inside. Each day they need me just a little less. Each day brings them one more day closer to growing up.
And it scares me. Have I done a good job as a mom so far? Is she going to be ok in school? Is she going to be a bully? How will her Diva ways translate into a public school yard? Will she be a mean girl?
So much of parenting is letting go. But what if I’m not ready to let go? What if I’m not ready to move on to the next phase?
I guess it doesn’t matter. Time stops for no one. Not even moms.
“It’s a strange thing, but when you are dreading something, and would give anything to slow down time, it has a disobliging habit of speeding up.” ~J.K. Rowling